Seeing Sparks

Well, it's only fair that I divulge the source of my nom de plume. After all, it is one of the bands I have seen performing live the most often. I first heard of them in probably the same way that everyone else of a certain age did - seeing them performing "This Town Ain't Big Enough for the Both of Us" on Top of the Pops. That rather unusual falsetto delivery of a bizarre set of lyrics, with a keyboard player whose moustache and demeanour were just a little unsettling. They were, of course, Russell and Ron Mael, the central twosome of the group Sparks. Although the other band members changed over the years, it is these brothers who remain the essence of Sparks.

It is somewhat ironic that the first album of theirs I bought was the least representative of their work. They ditched the guitars for a solid keyboard/synth sound as they teamed up with Italian electronic music maestro Giorgio Moroder for 1979's Number One In Heaven. The hits "Beat the Clock", "Tryouts for the Human Race" and "Number One Song in Heaven" gave them plenty of airtime. I was impressed to learn many years later that the metronomic drumming, so precise that it just had to be a drum machine, was actually played by a very talented session musician - Keith Forsey.

'Lil Beethoven was Sparks'19th album, released in 2002 showed precisely what makes them a band of which you can never tire. While most bands would be switching to their Greatest Hits tours, living off the big hits with which they made their name, Sparks were stretching and blurring the boundaries between many different music styles. The songs are grand in scale, with minimalist lyrics and fascinating percussion. The first track, "The Rhythm Thief" has kettle drums as the only percussion, played to emphasise the start of each line. Another standout song is "My Baby's Taking Me Home", which features the title phrase repeated over and over again, with one short, spoken stanza to unsettle you in the middle, but the accompaniment changes subtly throughout the song, with gentle but unusual key changes, taking you on a journey of sorts which builds to the most dramatic, almost breathtaking ending, still repeating that same phrase. My favourite song from this album, however, is the final track. A jaunty, bouncing melody over which Russell sings of the joys of being a Suburban Homeboy, delightfully taking the mickey out of those well-to-do, upper-middle class folk who like to pretend they are "street" - a bit like David Cameron and his dreadful "Hug a Hoodie" phase!

This album was followed up by "Hello Young Lovers" - in a similar vein, but with a few more lyrics(!) and a much rockier feel to it. 

I finally got to see Sparks performing in the run-up to the premiere of their 21st album, Exotic Creatures of the Deep, when they performed all 21 albums in order in 21 individual performances, with an encore of the B-sides and other songs from that era. I was lucky enough to get to see them perform Number One In Heaven, 'Lil Beethoven, Hello Young Lovers and Exotic Creatures of the Deep as part of that performance series. Heaven knows how the real fans managed when they went to see all twenty-one shows! 

True to form, Sparks have remained consistently inconsistent, following up Exotic Creatures with what is almost an opera about Swedish film director Ingmar Bergman. The Seduction of Ingmar Bergman imagines the director transported to Hollywood, where he is asked to direct the kind of trite blockbuster that his films would eschew. It all turns out to be a bad dream, from which he is rescued by the angel-like appearance of Greta Garbo. Then, just before Christmas, to celebrate the 40th anniversary of the album that gave them their first hit, they performed the album with a full orchestra. An outstanding evening and typically off-the-wall. Their next venture is a new "supergroup" which sees them joining forces with Franz Ferdinand. The group's name is the initials of both bands, apparently: FFS.

Bless their cotton socks!

Table for one, sir?

Aha - I didn't put this on my original list of possible blog topics, but food is, of course, another hobby of mine. Today, I was reminded of that particular joy of the single person - eating out alone.

My prompt for this post was my visit to The Jolly Postie here in sunny Royston earlier this evening. The place only opened yesterday, in the building that was the Old Crown, which had been empty for some time. It was great to see building work going on over the past few months, so I thought I'd give it a trial. On my own!

The venue (Is it a pub? Is it a restaurant?) is very well themed, with an old Royal Mail delivery van in the entrance lobby and huge postcards hanging from the ceiling. The sign outside has the eponymous postie freewheeling on his bike, legs akimbo, with letters flying all over. All very enticing, especially when the signs outside identify pizza as a speciality! Mmmmmm! Pizza!

There is clearly a lot of interest among my fellow Roystonians, but can I just say that it doesn't engender the most welcoming atmosphere to tell a single diner "well, we can sit you on this table, but you need to be gone by...". As I was walked to my seat, I noticed that the majority of tables were for four people or more. There were some two-seaters squeezed in, but these were being used by larger groups.

I took my seat at the end of a long table supported by those two-wheeled trolleys for shifting stacks of, erm, things. The handles protrude a good foot above the tabletop. If you suffer from "airplane wings" when you eat, watch your elbows! So - I sat down and ordered my drink and pizza.

Next little point - get the customer their drink pronto. It was nice to have three apologies for the time it was taking to get me my Long Island Iced Tea, but I'd rather have had the drink...  When you are there on your own, it makes you feel much less self-conscious if you have a drink in your hand. Or, perhaps more effectively, in your stomach where the alcohol can get to work on those pesky social inhibitions! Anyhow - I'm pleased to say that the cocktail was lovely, but gone too soon, so I followed it up with a welcome pint from the Camden Town Brewery. The pizza was excellent - very thin and crispy crust all the way across (which makes a real change) and the fries were nicely random, rather than identikit replicas of each other. And my third point - when bringing the food, check to see if another drink is needed! I'll definitely be back again - but I'll save it for when I have visitors as there are too few spaces suitable for us single diners.

Ironically, the long tables at The Jolly Postie would have been great if it weren't for those trolley handles sticking up through the tabletops and dividing the surface into four-seater chunks. They could have gone for the Wagamama approach and had everyone sitting along the long tables wherever there was space. There seems to be a great community atmosphere in the Jolly Postie - this would enhance that atmosphere greatly.

That was today's experience, but it wasn't the worst by a long shot! Ed's Diner (Rupert St, London)  is the only place where I actually left without leaving a tip, and that's an absolute first for me. You have a counter with individual stools along it, Ed's! How difficult is it to arrange a location for a lone diner? I'm sorry that the people sitting in a booth were using the stool on the end for their coats, but that's your problem, not mine and I really don't appreciate being asked to move halfway through my meal just because another group come in. The counter was empty when I entered your restaurant that day...

The other issue I have when eating or having a coffee on my own is facing a queue for service in a busy venue and having groups joining the queue behind me before sending one of their number off to nab a table. If you're on your own, you can't compete there...

Ah - my first major post has turned out to be a bit of a rant, so I'll end on a positive note with my best-ever experience of dining on my own. Yes, it was on holiday at Cedar Point, so I'd spent the day riding some of the best roller coasters in the world, and I was staying in Hotel Breakers on the Cedar Point peninsula just yards away from the special gate that got you into the park an hour before everyone else. But - there was a TGI Fridays on the ground floor of the hotel. The staff were brilliant - rapid service, nothing too much trouble, friendly banter but not too intrusive, they always sat me in a six-seater booth with no fuss, and I sat there, still buzzing from the day's coaster riding, drinking too many frozen Margaritas, eating pretty much everything on the menu and reading "The Life of Pi". My happiest single-diner memories on record!